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Untitled

Aug 30 '14

notchicken:

*releases 420 cows into a field* hahahaha graze it

Aug 30 '14
Aug 30 '14

readtofilth:

thenorsebros:

x

Chris Pratt is literally a huge dorkball that just so happened to get paid to get fit and I literally would adore him in any shape he takes.

Aug 30 '14

jipersnoeofficial:

officialcheesepolice:

jipersnoeofficial:

to all the people with shitty mums i want to make it known that i am your mum now

you are a 20 year old male

  • I
  • AM
  • YOUR
  • MOTHER
  • NOW

(Source: officialjipersnoe)

Aug 30 '14

I hate my friends

noo-interruption:

lokis-army-at-221b:

wingsofjusice:

youknowwhat-kissme-cas:

lunaticphan:

So my driving instructor texted me, and I was walking so I just typed ‘Ok’ and hit send and then I looked at it and was like WHAT

image

But as it turns out, my friends are entirely responsible for turning ‘Ok’ into a shortcut. 

imageimage

Cry

but what did your driving instructor say

WHAT DID HE SAY

THIS IS NOT A FUN CLIFFHANGER

152,000 people want to know what your teacher responded.

Aug 30 '14

jaclcfrost:

hotels can’t be boring to me

they’re just fun

even if i’m sitting in the room watching tv or riding the elevator or sleeping it’s just fun for some reason like they’re average every day things but in a hotel everything is way more amusing and interesting and just simply being in a hotel is fun to me and i don’t understand

(Source: jaclcfrost)

Aug 30 '14

gr0sse:

KIDS REACT TO existentialism and the inevitability of death

Aug 30 '14
Aug 30 '14

hroakie:

one of the smaller more subtle things about video games that i absolutely love is when your footsteps sound different depending where you’re walking like hell yeah

(Source: s1aine)

Aug 30 '14

the-robot-condese:

tiny-little-nebula:

taloa-nashoba:

thatthirstyniggafromclass:

misconceptions about strippers. 

pussy preach more sense than the fuckin government.

I want to break necks when people shade strippers. Let’s see your janky ass get out there and look that cute in 6 inch heels for 8 hours, smiling the entire time, stroking egos, pretending a dude’s breath doesn’t smell like a rotten animal.

Truth.

My sister has a Masters in Education. She got a job at one of the poorest schools in the city, but didn’t make enough money to pay to keep her tiny house heated through the Oregon winter or buy enough food or take her dog to the vet (first person who drops the word rehome gets a kick in the face.) so she quit and the only job she could get because she’s “overqualified” to work at Fred Meyers was at a strip club because she minored in ballet. I think people forget that stripping is like any other job: you have to have some experience.

And all those crumpled one dollar bills? 20% of that goes back into the club because strippers are renting the stages they dance on. Sometimes it’s more.

Despite all of that, my sister makes more money than she ever did because she works 80 hour weeks and literally never takes a day off. She teaches classes to drunk white girls, she does private parties, she does entertainment for conferences and shows. 

When I had to go to the ER last February and got a bill for $800 that I couldn’t pay, my sister sent me money so I wouldn’t be sent to collections. 

My sister is the classiest motherfucker in a pair of six inch heels. Anyone who calls her a dumb slut or a hoe gets their shit wrecked.

that’s the best thing i ever just heard get said

(Source: pinkvelourtracksuit)